Resigned

Well, just like that, the dream job is over.

This morning, I resigned as the director of the Lake Elmo Public Library. I imagine this is pretty shocking news, unless you’ve talked to me in the last couple weeks.

I’ll tell you what, it’s shocking news for me. I tried everything I could think of to make this work but I just wasn’t able.

I don’t really want to go into much detail here, if you want the full story, just call me or email me and I’ll tell you, it’s not a secret. The short version is this.

They promised me they would make me full time, which is why I was willing to kill myself these last four months; working to make this happen. Just under two weeks ago, they reneged on that promise. They made it clear to me they would not be hiring me full time, probably not ever.

It’s incredibly disappointing. I’m very sad today. However, I’ve realized I can’t make this be the job I wanted. The job, the people, the library, they are exactly as they are. There was no room for change. I tried my best to make this match my vision and it just wouldn’t bend. So I had to face the fact that no matter how good this job looked, it was simply not the job I wanted it to be. And I had to let it go.

Regardless of this bitter ending, I am leaving this job with my integrity intact and a healthy dose of pride for what I accomplished.

In under three months, with no staff, limited support (no one with library experience), and no money, I managed to launch a public library. It’s a rare and incredible feat and I’m very proud of what I did. On main street in downtown Lake Elmo, there stands a little library. It’s quaint and charming, a testament to the community and to the volunteers who pitched in with the time and love. Mostly, it is a testament to me. The director who worked, often beyond the hours for which I was paid, to build this little library from nothing.

No matter how it ended, you will always be able to visit that library and know that I was the one who built it. I was the one that made an empty shell of a building into a library.

I did that. And that is what I am taking from this experience. My last official day is Friday. Until then, for just a few more days, you’re welcome to still call me Madame Director.

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5 thoughts on “Resigned

  1. I love you Livi! Yes, hold your head up and be VERY proud of what you’ve accomplished ! You did build a wonderful library with virtually no support and much opposition.
    I know you wanted it to be different, but don’t be sad, everything has a purpose:) This was just a stepping stone for greater things. I like to believe that:)

    • I love you, too. I’m very proud. But today I’ve learned that pride does not eclipse sadness. So, there’s that. And I’m feeling discouraged about the “greater things” plan. Professionally, it’s been a long time since things have gone my way.

  2. How disappointing for you. I’m sorry it didn’t work out and they were too, well, stupid to see what they’d be giving up by not offering you the hours they promised. Thinking of you!

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