Keeps Getting Better

Ever have one of those days where little things keep popping up to make you happy and it just seems like it keeps getting better?

Today is one of those days. Blog comments, emails I wasn’t expecting….and, finally, some amazing news.

Christian Kane (if you’ve ever read my blog, surely you must know of my love for all things Christian Kane) is FINALLY returning to television! He’s been cast as one of the leads in a new tv series called The Librarians. It’s based off the movie series of the same name, the ones starring Noah Wylie. Wylie will be in the show, too, along with Rebecca Romijn. But who cares about that? CHRISTIAN KANE is going to be back on my tv!!!

I haven’t seen him in anything since Leverage went off the air on December 25, 2012. He’s made a movie since then, but it is in limited release and, as of yet, has not been released within reasonable driving distance of my home, so I haven’t seen it.

But they called him off the road a few weeks back, from promoting the movie, 50 to 1, because the creators of Leverage wanted him for a new tv show. It’s finally been confirmed that TNT has picked up the show for 10 episodes that will be released, wait for it, in the fall of 2014! That is this year!

Now we just have to hope the show is amazing and gets picked up so I can get my weekly CK fix. I’ll watch it no matter what, that goes without saying, but it’d be nice if it worked out and he had a regular series again. It’s nice for me. And probably him, too, I suppose.

The other news in Kaniac-land is that for the show, the producers made him cut his hair. You saw him in the blog I did about photoshop and yes, he’s wearing a hat (that was for the movie promo) but you can certainly tell that his hair is considerably shorter there, than it was, say, here (he’s the fourth picture down…just scroll). He actually cut his long hair toward the end of Leverage, I think I might have blogged about it here but I can’t find it. Anyway, he’s cut it again. Now he looks like this:


Yep, that’s the shortest his hair has been in about a decade. When Angel first began, his hair was that short, but he had started growing it out by the end.

Because I’m just making my own day, here’s a pic of him from the first season of Angel, in 2003, eleven years ago.


See, short hair? And that’s the CK I developed my crush on, but I always did have a thing for his long hair. At any rate, he’s handsome regardless of what his hair looks like. The point is. HE’S COMING BACK TO TV! Soon! And I’m so happy I could dance a jig. (And yeah, I used that as an excuse to talk about him and post pictures. That’s why I blog. To do whatever the hell I want.) My day: keeps getting better. Christian Kane: KEEPS GETTING BETTER

Mass of Nerves

Last week, I got a haircut.

This is normally not cause for excitement, for most people. However, I think we all know, I am most assuredly NOT most people.

I have anxiety about getting my haircut. I detest it. It makes me feel sick to my stomach and tenses up my muscles. I always, always, always leave with a headache. It’s absurd, really. For 14 years, my hair has been largely unchanged. I grew it out, all one length and very, very long. Then I just left it alone. Once a year, I would get the ends trimmed. Then, someone told me that it would be healthier to get the ends trimmed twice a year. I cowboyed up and talked myself into twice as many haircuts.

Eventually, having the same cut, time after time, my nerves started to settle. I still didn’t LIKE getting a haircut, but I didn’t feel like I was going to vomit, either. It was a big step for me. However, that was just a trim, maybe and inch or two and nothing else changed. Certainly not my overall style.

Then, this year, I started to get frustrated with my hair (that never happens. I have easy, flexible, manageable hair). Suddenly, thoughts started creeping in. What if I cut it? Would my hair look like THAT if I cut it off? Maybe I should make a change…

And then I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Of course, in true Livlife fashion, I couldn’t just GO and get it cut. I had to research it first. Weeks of reading articles about haircuts. Looking at photos online. Checking out products that might help. Deciding on the style. Most of that time was spent talking myself into the decision. I finally decided on shortening the length by 6-8 inches, which brings the ends up to my bra strap (instead of hanging down to my ass, where it has resided for more than a decade). And adding in long layers, losing the allonelength blahness I’ve been sporting.

Once I made it, I made it. This is what I was doing. Or so I thought. I went on Wednesday of last week (Zack’s 30th birthday) and actually chickened out. I pumped myself up for the next 24 hours and then went back on Thursday. I made it inside. There was a wait. I almost passed out. WAIT?!?!? Do they not know how hard it was to come in here in the first place?

Still, I persevered. I eventually got to that sink at Fantastic Sams. They started washing my hair (which I love. This girl was terrible at it, but it was still SO MUCH BETTER than the haircut part) and I relaxed.

Then, I sat in the chair. Apparently, I tensed. Majorly. My shoulders got all hunchy and I was smaller, somehow. The girl noticed and asked me to try and relax. I tried. I forced myself to unhunch my shoulders and tried to take deep breaths. They came out sounding like I was in labor, but it was helping-sort of. My eyes were squeezed shut the entire time. I couldn’t watch her cut my hair.

Once I opened my eyes and my nausea kicked in so hard I slammed my lids shut like a little kid and vowed not to peek again until it was over. I didn’t.

When she was done, she kept peppering me with questions (really, the most annoying girl, but she gives good haircuts). Do I want product in my hair? How would I like it styled? Do I want her to dry it all the way? What do I think? Do I want to look? and on and on and on.

Really, all I wanted was out of that chair and out of that salon and to go home to my house to grieve in private.

Finally, I got out of there.

I got home, flipped it around, ran my fingers through it, realized that hair weighs way more than we think it does and realized, I kind of liked it.

{Indulge me for a moment, I’m going to pout and whine}

And, no one noticed.

No one.

Not a single person.

Obviously, this was huge for me. Earth shattering (yes, the drama, I know). I’ve lived with this for weeks. It is a milestone in my life. I can tell you how old I was for every major haircut (all three of them). This is a big deal.

And no one noticed.

I feel like it makes me look so totally different I am surprised that people aren’t stopping me on the street to point out the difference. Logically, I know it is not that drastic, but still 6-8 inches is a major haircut, for anyone. And no one noticed.

I finally got sick of no one noticing and mentioned it to my mom. Who, of all people, should have A) noticed and B) realized how big of a deal this is. She did neither. Instead, once I pointed it out she said, “I’m sure it looks nice, when you fix it”.


I’ll admit it was a little windblown at that moment, but it WAS fixed.

So, okay.

Maybe the problem isn’t that they’re not noticing, maybe everyone thinks it looks terrible? Thanks, mom.

{End of pity party}

I guess I should get used to the fact that most people don’t think a haircut is a big deal. Most people aren’t a mass of nerves at a thought of scissors near their head. Most people get regular haircuts and change the style whenever they feel like it.

Once again, I’m not most people. I’m me. But, now, I’m me with a new haircut. Unremarkable or not.