Trivia Wednesday Fridays

Last night, Justin and I were going to go get a beer. Then, he said he’d rather bring a bottle of wine over to my house and hang out. He had a wine class until 7pm and was coming over right after.

Well, wine class went until 8pm. We had a couple glasses of wine and I asked him if he was hungry. He was…and so was I. I have almost no food in my house so I ran the list of options past him. He was in the mood for some sort of taco app from TGI Fridays. I said that was fine, but I was changing first. I was already in my pajamas before he got there. (I love having a house and being able to “stay in” and entertain friends in my pjs!).

He gave me a “guy” look and said, “you look fine”. I said, “I am not going to dinner in my pajamas.” He replied, “why not? It’s dark in there, just like in here.”

I’m not really sure what he meant by that, but I found it hilarious. Yes, it was dim in my house, we were sitting on the porch with only the pigs for light. And, yes, it was likely going to be dim in the restaurant, but neither one of those had any thing to do with my wearing pajamas. Is that how guys think?

I changed. We went.

When we got to Fridays, it was probably quarter to 10. That’s so late for me. Really. I couldn’t believe I was changing to go out on a Wednesday at 930 pm. But, I was seriously hungry.

It was slow in there and they announced that they were beginning live trivia. 90s trivia! Justin and I got excited because we were the oldest people in there by several years. I think the others in the place were born in the 90s.

We ordered apps, on Happy Hour (except for the one Justin wanted, naturally) and beers. The first round of trivia was Twins trivia. 90s Twins trivia didn’t sound too good to me, until the guy said, “90s and today, for this round only”.

We got a perfect score. 10/10.

The next round was 90s TV. We got 9/10. We actually had written the right answer to the other one, but we second guessed ourselves and changed it and got it wrong.

At some point, our server came by and said, “I hope you beat them”. I assumed she meant the table full of 12-year-olds we were playing against. She said they come every week and are the reigning champions. Well, duh. There’s 9 of them playing on the team, they all have cell phones, AND, they’re friends with the trivia host. Um, of course they always win. (And let’s be clear, they had drinks in front of them, but if they were actually 21, then they were ONLY 21, making them born in 1990).

But, Justin and I are smart…and determined.

Round 3 was 90s movies. We got an 8/10. We missed a question about an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie. I don’t really feel bad about that. I don’t remember the other one we missed, but I know we guessed when we wrote it down. However, the host wasn’t paying attention, and gave us 11 questions, so there was a bonus. Actual score for this round, 9/11.

Round 4 was the final round. It was 90s music. Lucky for me, Justin loves that s**t. In the 90s, I was primarily a country girl. I actually had never heard several of the songs. It was ridiculous. They played a song and we had to write down the artist only. It was fine, we got the first one, no problem. Then I noticed the children we were playing against using their phones on every question. It occurred to me that they were probably Shazaming the answers! Well, screw that, we’re not losing because they are cheating.

So, we Shazamed as well. But, because we’re more honest, I wouldn’t write down the answer until Justin gave me his response. He got all but one right without my help. I seriously only knew two of them. So, we got another perfect score.

That makes our grand total 38/41.

That’s awesome. Especially since, when he was reading off the correct answers, the children were groaning and saying they got it wrong at least five times. We won, I was sure of it.

So, they read out 3rd place. (Apparently, others were playing, but who cared, really?) The host said, “with a score of 33/41…team blahblah”.

Then, he said, “and our 2nd, oh wait we have a tie!” And he never read the scores. Just said that Justin and I TIED with the children. There is no way we tied.

So then, he says there will be a tiebreaker. One member from each team will go up and answer a single question. Justin said I should go. I said we should find out the category first.

Trivia host said, “Movies.”

We sent Justin.

So the question is this, “how much did the movie, The Hangover, gross worldwide?”

And closest wins.

I couldn’t believe it. I would have had no idea. That seemed really hard to me. Justin wrote down an answer and I started Googling.

I’m not going to tell you the answer right now, but I will say that I would not have guessed anywhere in the vicinity.

So Justin and the 14-year-old he’s playing against, put down their answers and turn them in. Trivia host/friend of the children looks at their answers and announces. I’ll read the answer from team OJ first. And Justin guessed 400 million.

The actual answer was 467 million.

I was completely blown away that he was that close, just guessing blind.

THEN….after he reads our answer, AFTER seeing BOTH answers, he read the other. They guessed 425 million.

Does anyone know where I am going with this?

I’m 99.9% certain that we got cheated.

I bet you money that Justin’s answer was the closer one and the trivia guy made up a closer answer to give his friends the win. That is assuming, of course, that they even tied us in the first place, which I doubt they did. It was the most bogus game ever. Justin and I played some of the best trivia of our lives and we got screwed over by cheaters and TGI Fridays.

Whatever. I never liked that place anyway.

So, the “friends” won a $50 gift card to Fridays and we won $10. The card we won we weren’t supposed to use that night, but our server “bent” the rules and allowed it. I seriously think she even knew we got screwed and felt bad for us.

And, since we were on HH, our four beers and three appetizers only came to $28. After the gift card, our tab was $18, so it isn’t like I’m complaining. As Justin said, we came in for food and ended up having fun and getting a free $10.

He’s right, of course.

But I still don’t like that place.

Everybody Knows the Trouble I Feel, Everybody Knows My Sorrow

Monday was the memorial service for my friend Peter.

Several people mentioned to me the comfort they found in being able to celebrate life.  I don’t know about that. I’m not sure that grieving in a group is easier. I had a really tough time at the service. There were so many things I wanted to say, to pay tribute to Peter and I couldn’t do it. I did not have it in me to share my grief outside. Did it help to see how many others were likewise grieving for Pete? Not really. Grief is very internal for me. I knew I was grieving and no, it didn’t help. I could barely watch the slideshow because it made me so sad. I eventually had to force myself to just watch it straight through because I doubted I would have another opportunity. I was just standing still in the middle of a crowd, crying. When it was over, I made my way through the sea of bodies to the exit and got outside. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I felt like the room was closing in on me and I needed to escape. As I passed through the people milling about I caught snatches of conversations and heard snippets of laughter. While I understand, intellectually, that people just make conversation and it isn’t out of the ordinary, it hurt me. I didn’t feel it was appropriate to laugh, to talk about my new job or my new house, or anything. I just wanted to be sad and the 200 people surrounding me weren’t helping me do that nor making it any easier.

But, then I paused, outside, and took a deep breath. Within seconds, my friend Frodo came after me. He noticed my escape and he followed. He hugged me and I could tell that he felt it, too. It was hard and I was not alone in my grief, no matter how it felt inside. Yes, people chat and laugh but that doesn’t mean they aren’t hurting, too. The people that came, the people that knew him, they understood. Frodo showed me that because it was clear he could see inside me to my grief–it helped me realize that I wasn’t hurting inside as much as I thought, my grief showed. Frodo helped.

It was so hard that day. But, I think the hardest part was the next day. I kept thinking as the service wound down, “what now?” It didn’t seem real that I would get up the next day and go to work and it would just be another Tuesday. How is it possible that it could be a regular day? Peter is gone. Forever. There is nothing regular, nothing normal, nothing real about that. It is senseless and painful and how is it possible that things just keep moving forward?

Then, this morning I was walking down the hall at work. We have these quotes all over our walls. I love them. I’ve read every single one dozens of times over and I still read them as I pass, but they don’t carry the impact they did the first days of starting here. Now, I’ve become numb. Often, I see them without really seeing them. The one I pass the most, the one I’ve read the most often, hangs outside my library, down the hall. I pass it multiple times every day.

Just today, I looked at it and it stopped me in my tracks. Literally.

I stood there, staring at it, then I did a total about-face and went back into the library to grab my phone and take a picture.


That is how I’ve been feeling all week, then Robert Frost helped me out. Life does go on. I get that, really, I do. It is the hardest part of this whole thing. How did Peter choose to stop allowing life to go on? It hurts, but it does go on, march forward, inevitably. We can’t slow it and we can’t stop it. Even when it hurts, we just have to ride out the tide until it gets better. And the best part is that it will get better. It always does.

Lastly, I want to mention something that struck me on Monday. It was absolutely gorgeous, weather-wise. As I was going about my day I thought to myself, “what a beautiful day”. Then I felt bad for thinking that on the day of Peter’s memorial service. And suddenly, I had a flash. There was an episode of Friends, where they all attended the funeral of Ross and Monica’s grandmother. Phoebe said, “what a great day” or something. And they all looked at her in shock that she’d say that at a funeral. Then she quickly corrected that she was talking about the weather. It made me smile that I experienced a similar story, even if it was only in my own head.

Looking back, I think it was gorgeous that day on purpose. The weather is changing toward blustery fall days and it seems like the heavens took it upon themselves to grace us with one last beautiful day. Like they knew that those of us who were hurting would need something beautiful to look to, something awesome to enjoy. It helped me get through, so I believe that was the intent.

Hey, Pete? Can you name the 20 U.S. Presidents who don’t have an “O” in their last name?

Somewhere, wherever you are, I know you can and you’re ticking them off on your fingers–as I type this. I miss you my friend. Always will.